robbed

Monday morning and we come in to find the office is a mess. The door has been smashed and there is glass all over the place.

The thieves took our new plasma TV and a good chunk of xmas spirit. Thankfully they left our computers alone - I guess the TV was too big to carry - we couldn't get it in the car to have it delivered - so that was some bonus. It means that we have had to have anew door fitted and bolt everything down with chains.

Anyway thats life I guess.

I decided to get my own back on the villains so here is a copy of the letter we have now got posted on the entrance to our building. Enjoy and feel free to use it if you ever get done over.

TO THE THEIVEING BASTARDS THAT STOLE OUR TV

If you are capable of reading this – which we doubt as you are clearly as stupid as horse shit – you will be delighted to know that your face is now on CCTV which we have installed.


SMILE!


The longer you read this note the better the picture will be and we are sure that by the time you get this far you will have started to panic.

DON’T

No need – the police will be in touch soon.

We hope you enjoy Santa’s visit when he comes over with a nice search warrant and some big hammers to smash down the door of the shithole you call home.

In case you didn’t know thieves always get caught. You are just too dumb not to.

Incidentally I bet your dick is as small as a walnut now.

Just wait until you get raped in the showers! How big and clever will you feel then?

Before you leave we wanted to say we hope that you get HIV from your cell mate and that you spend every Christmas in Hell from now on you low life bastards.

Yours truly,

All the decent people in the world who will get you in the end