Austin - centre of chaos

Yodel aye eee whoooo!

Fresh from the museli and crunchy nut cornflake enema I sit (carefully) at my computer and sneer with distain at the carnage that is about to begin in Austin.

Actually I am begining to regret not going a bit but then you can't be mental and live in a rubber room when there is work to be done now can you?

I have just been informed of some of the stats for this years sxsw and it's insane.
Get this:
1536 acts will perform at the event this year.
Most of them will do 3 or more shows. (Thats over 3000 shows in 4 days!!!!)
The UK alone has 123 showcases
SXSW has trebled in size since 2001

With all that lot bashing away for a week you have to wonder where you start. (If you are Joe from our San Francisco office you snog the singer of Flaming lips - yeeuch!)

The thing is that the whole shebang was set up to showcase new acts to labels and other media so they had a chance of seeing what was good bad or indifferent in a few days. These days though it has become a frantic rush from one venue to another if you are in A&R or a good excuse to get hammered and see some old favorites if you aren't.

I will guarantee you that the best results from this week will not come from a show but from someone schmoozing at the 4 Seasons bar one wild night.

If my experience is anything to go on the only shows the "players" will attend will be at Stubbs or maybe Emo's on the first night and after that they will be in room 701 getting jiggy with a nice gal called Amber from the day- night agency in San Antonio. ($200 / hour plus expenses).



Have you seen who is making news before the event has even kicked off? The Stooges, Pete Townsend and David Byrne. Great artists but hardly unsigned raw talent are they?

It makes me fret when I know how hard people try to make an impact and the promises are all false. The most lucrative part of being there is as a sound tech or bar owner not as part of a wanna be band.

The excitment that once was sxsw is now just a corporate "fuck me over" disguised as a break through opportunity.

Until they get a grip and really get the event back to being for new and unknown bands it will be just another excuse for milking the indie cow until the udders bleed dry. Canadian Music Week is a much better bet these days and you don't need to check your guns at the door or wave the lone star flag to avoid getting killed on your way back East either.

It is such a pity that it has all gone corporate but you know how well informed and unprincipled "the man" is and if you invite him into your boudoir don't be surprised if he rips off your knickers and roots you on the floor. You were ASKING FOR IT now weren't you? (The Defense rests your Honour).

I told you - time and again in my fantastic new book - THE SOUND OF MONEY - but would you listen (or buy it even?) no no no! Why not - well because it's not published until summer but you can pre-order if you like (see I learnt a trick or two from my hours at the Hilton coffee shop).

If you feel disillusioned after sxsw and you haven't made that major breakthrough please feel free to join me at the ADOLF KLEPTINGER CLINIC, COMO, SWITZERLAND, EUROPE where we will be auditioning glockenspiel players on April 12th at 2pm. (Black Tie essential)

Auf Wiedersein