The Lithuanian Property Market

It is incredible. Truly amazing. I am stunned.

Here I am sitting in the lobby of a rather swanky hotel in Deutchland with an imported - an it has to be said expenzive (sic) - copy of the Financial TImes in my hands when one of the unbiquitous inserts falls into my lap.
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"Meet McEnroe, Becker, Cash etc" it says. Wimbledon 2007."

Now, I have not the slightest interest in Tennis. As far as I am concerned it is just another waste of effort but because it is a rather boring aspect to life on the road; this sitting in lobbies and waiting for things; I have quick squizz. Lots of nice pictures and blurb and then the price. JESUS!

Mens Doubles Finals - £2395!!!! Thats around $5000 US each!!!! Holy cow.

It isn't even for one of the singles finals.

For that money you get Strawberries, lunch and - television to watch the matches on the day.

The rugby world cup is in there too, That one is £ 2995 for 2 days including the final.

I do understand the corporate thing that is going on and that multi million dollar deals are done at these events but it has got me to thinking that we have really screwed up in the music business.

How can it be possible that that kind of money is being thrown about on sports when music is lucky to get away with a few quid for a CD?

It made me look at the pages of the FT a bit more closely today and I have found out some other interesting facts.
Did you know that the Lithuanian property market is 90% financed by Swiss Francs, or that there is a big fight going on for purchase of the Chicago exchange?

No, neither did I.

So what the hell has that got to do with us? Well, quite a lot in fact.

If Lithuania borrows in Francs and then the Swiss put the rates up their nice little earner becomes a bit of a disaster and that in turn leads to another episode like the one that is happening in the US sub-prime lending markets - look it up if you don't understand that. That leads to a collapse of confidence in the German, Lithuaniana banking sector and suddenly a big economy hits the skids.

Uh - YEAH BUT WHO CARES?

You should. Because if that happens and Germany goes pop (like a weasel not like Nena and her 99 luft ballons) the Euro loses value and makes European goods cheaper for everyone. Thus the American, Chinese and everyone else buys well engineered and stylish euro goods instead of brash and broken Chryslers.

The mighty economies lose sales and punish everyone with trade sanctions and bullshit like the Doha round of interminable trae talks. The rest of the world sees the Euro getting more valuable and gets shitty with the hawks on capital hill for once and Japan sells its holdings of the the dollar. The only thing thatis keeping Team USA afloat right now is Japanese and Arab money - remember that.

American confidence goes down and you find that the only things available now are not exactly the best - like Zenith Tv's instead of Sony's - and it gets more expensive to buy basics like your food. Money is getting tighter so you cut back on frivolities like music and sales decrease even more. Suddenly bands are getting dropped and the job you thought was safe is not and so it goes on and on.

It is the vicious circle.

Not a happy thought is it?

The Lithuanian property market has indirectly fucked up your record collection. Go figure...... as they say in parts west of here.

There is another option. We could actually revalue our own products and make them desireable and more expensive.

Take a leaf out of the classical book and make your shows so exotic and special that they become corporate events that people want to attend for "business purposes". What better way to attract publicity and value than by excluding the sweating proles from your gigs and making it all so exclusive that only the suits can attend?

Or how about only releasing very expensive and therefore rare albums that are so heavily protected by DRAM that they can only be played twice before self destruting (Actually thats a bloody good idea. You can't have that - its mine - copyright - patent pending). They could be the Faberge eggs of music. Like a really obscure wine that no one ever drinks but that some idiot will pay millions for.

But if we do that we lose everything we ever stood for and join the corporate band. So much for indie!

I guess it has already happened with people like Philip Green paying George Michael £5 million to play a party for him but that really sucks. I don't begrudge GM for taking the dosh - who wouldn't so long as he keeps on playing shows for us poor peasants.

My advice:

Keep on fighting because sooner or later Live Nation are going to make this play and we are all going to have to revalue our services and that will be a show worth watching.

Tot Ziens - for those of you who speak Dutch ( I have no idea what it is in Lithuanian so that will have to do for now)